Perfectionism is a great enemy of people, because a perfectionist person tends to set very high and unrealistic standards. It is often accompanied by fear of failure or exaggerated self-criticism when standards are not met. For bariatric patients, perfectionism can interfere with successful weight loss and the maintenance of healthy habits in several ways, which we elaborate on below:
Unrealistic expectations: As a perfectionist, you often set impossible goals for weight loss or habit change, which can quickly lead to frustration if results don’t show up right away or in the form you want.
Fear of failure: When you’re having difficulty sticking to a diet or exercise program, perfectionism can cause you to give up completely, instead of adjusting your plan or learning from your mistakes.
Excessive self-criticism: A small slip-up, such as an unhealthy meal or a day without exercise, can be perceived by a perfectionist as a major failure, which can cause a drop in motivation and increased feelings of guilt and shame.
“All or nothing”: Perfectionists tend to adopt an “all or nothing” mentality, meaning that any deviation from the plan is seen as a total failure. Instead of taking small actions and following through, they risk abandoning their efforts altogether.
Very many bariatric patients will find themselves in the perfectionist situation, that’s why Ioana Cadar, psychologist in the Doctor Dejeu Team – the most sought after multidisciplinary bariatric team in Romania, presents some solutions to combat perfectionism:
- Set realistic and measurable goals that are adapted to your pace.
- Embrace the process and the small advances, without punishing yourself for the small stagnations.
- Accept that health and losing weight is a long-term process, not an immediate result.
- Replace self-criticism with self-compassion – every step forward counts, even the smallest.
- Perfectionism can slow down your progress if not managed correctly, so it’s extremely important to focus on balance and flexibility instead of perfection!
- Life is not just about the extremes of black and white; it’s full of shades and colors that lie in between these two extremes.
One piece of advice that the entire Doctor Dejeu team always offers to its patients is to seek specialist support. The best decisions are made together with a competent multidisciplinary team, who know when and how to offer appropriate solutions for weight loss and a better lifestyle.