Study: 45% of Young Romanians Report Emotional Abuse in Relationships

Almost half (45%) of young Romanians aged 14-25 say they have encountered emotional abuse in their own relationship or as witnesses, making it the most common form of abuse mentioned by young people. However, 52% of girls identify this issue compared to only 38% of boys, according to the study “In a Relationship – Love and Abuse in Gen Z & Alpha,” conducted by the Friends for Friends Foundation and Reveal Marketing Research.

Emotional abuse is followed by digital abuse, with 28% of mentions, physical abuse (20%), financial abuse (12%), and sexual abuse (10%).

The study is nationally representative and was conducted between April and May 2024 on a sample of 403 young people aged 14-25 who use the internet, using the CAWI (Computer-Assisted Web Interviews) method. 52% of respondents were female. The research considered five forms of abuse: emotional, physical, sexual, financial, and digital.

“The data reveals young people’s perceptions of various aspects of their romantic and sexual lives. The study results show that 14-15-year-olds are the most likely to declare that they have not encountered any form of abuse as victims, aggressors, or witnesses (38%), while this percentage slightly decreases with age, reaching 34% among respondents aged 20-25. These findings indicate a significant lack of education regarding the different forms of abuse in romantic relationships, as well as a normalization of abusive behaviors. Additionally, the figures highlight concerning discrepancies between girls and boys, from the ability to identify abuse to the willingness to acknowledge or recognize their role as aggressors. Moreover, the study suggests that young people from single-parent families seem more exposed to abuse in romantic relationships, while those with separated but present parents have a high rate of observing abuse in other relationships. Those with both parents together report witnessing abuse less frequently, which may result from family protection or the normalization of certain abusive behaviors,” said Silvia Ciubotaru (Guță), project coordinator for In a Relationship, developed by the Friends for Friends Foundation.

What do young people appreciate in a partner?

Regardless of gender or age, young people value sincerity (32%), loyalty (25%), respect (23%), and love (22%) in a partner.

Among 14-15-year-olds, intelligence (24% vs. 11% overall) and physical attractiveness (19% vs. 9% overall) are significantly more appreciated than in other age groups. Meanwhile, for those aged 20-25, respect is more frequently mentioned (31% vs. 23% overall).

The most common way young people meet their partners is through their friend groups (46%), followed by school (41%), sports or leisure activities (22%—such as parties and festivals), online groups and forums (20%), online dating apps (15%), and the workplace (10%).

The preferred type of relationship among young people is exclusive monogamy (65%), though this preference is significantly lower among 14-15-year-olds (52%). This younger group shows a higher preference—nearly 23%—for open/non-exclusive relationships where their friends are aware of multiple partners.

What leads young people to break up?

The main reasons young people would end their relationship include infidelity (45%), lying (30%), physical violence (29%), and verbal abuse (11%).

Girls are significantly more likely to mention physical violence (41% vs. 15% of boys), lack of interest (13% vs. 7%), and abuse in general (6% vs. 2%), whereas boys more frequently cite incompatibility (7% vs. 2%) and dishonesty (4% vs. 0%).

Among 14-15-year-olds, betrayal is mentioned more often (16%) compared to the total sample (8%), while 20-25-year-olds cite physical violence more frequently (38%) compared to the overall group (29%).

Emotional abuse: 20% of girls report frequent threats, coercion, or manipulation in relationships

Emotional abuse includes verbal and non-verbal behaviors that negatively impact a person’s psychological or physical well-being. In this study, young people’s exposure to emotional abuse was measured across several factors:

• Threats, coercion, and constraints
• Mockery, ridicule, insults, or constant criticism
• Manipulation through lies, omissions, exaggerations, or deception
• Emotional blackmail through self-victimization or unfair blame
• Violation of a partner’s privacy

43% of respondents say they frequently observe threats in other couples, and 20% of girls report experiencing them personally.

Additionally, half of the respondents have frequently witnessed mockery, ridicule, or constant criticism in other couples, with this type of abuse being significantly more reported among girls (53% vs. 40% for boys). Almost half (46%) have often seen manipulation in other couples, and 28% of girls report experiencing it personally, compared to 15% of boys.

40% have frequently observed privacy violations in relationships, with girls again reporting personal experience at a higher rate (22% vs. 16% for boys).

Digital abuse: A quarter of young people have frequently seen online stalking or GPS tracking in relationships

Digital abuse includes verbal aggression, misuse of confidential information, or identity theft in the virtual environment.

One in four girls has frequently observed threatening posts or messages in other relationships, and 10% of them report experiencing this frequently themselves, compared to only 4% of boys. Additionally, a quarter of respondents have frequently witnessed partners stalking each other online or through GPS tracking apps, rising to 31% for girls. Girls are also twice as likely as boys to admit to engaging in such behavior (10% vs. 5%).

Physical abuse: 14% of girls report frequent slapping in relationships

Physical abuse involves the use of force to instill fear or harm a partner, including slapping, punching, kicking, pushing, shaking, or choking.

One in five respondents has frequently observed slapping in other couples, with girls reporting experiencing it twice as often as boys (14% vs. 7%).

Similarly, 12% of respondents frequently observe shoving, shaking, or choking in other couples, while 8% have personally experienced it—again, twice as many girls as boys (10% vs. 5%).

Financial abuse: 10% of respondents have observed money being hidden or stolen in relationships

Financial abuse includes controlling or restricting a partner’s access to money or manipulating them for financial benefits.

One in ten respondents says they have frequently seen partners hiding or stealing money from each other, and 3% admit to either experiencing or engaging in this behavior.

13% have observed a partner spending shared savings without consent, with girls being three times more likely than boys to report experiencing this themselves.

Sexual abuse: 16% of respondents have frequently witnessed non-consensual touching in other couples

Sexual abuse includes unwanted intimate touching, coercion into unwanted sexual activity, refusal to use contraception, street harassment, grooming, and engaging in intimacy with someone unable to give consent (e.g., under the influence of alcohol or drugs).

16% of respondents frequently witness non-consensual touching in other relationships, with significantly more reports from girls, 12% of whom say they have personally experienced it (vs. 3% of boys).

14% have observed coercion into unwanted sexual activity, again more commonly reported by girls.

10% of respondents frequently encounter partners refusing to use contraception. One in five has experienced frequent street harassment, with the percentage rising to nearly one-third among girls.

Approximately 13% have observed grooming in other relationships—where an older person manipulates a younger, inexperienced individual into an inappropriate or prohibited relationship.